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  • #143077
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Anyone thats been around John knows he’s good for at least 1 lame joke. Here is another one
    A guy walks into a bar with a set of booster cables around his neck. Bartender looks him over and says” OK Pal, you can stay, but don’t start anything” 🙄

    #145746
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Dennis: You couldn’t pattern your life after a better person than me and I will make you the king of the “one-liners.” When you are practicing your one-liners, don’t get down on yourself “because the only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.” When you feel blue, start breathing again. Just one question I would like to ask you, “Is a castrated pig disgrunted?” Have a nice day in the Land of the North!! Your mentor, John (The Man)
    P.S. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? So what are you getting for Valentine’s Day? 😯

    #145747
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Never Ever do I want to hear the words “John” and “lingerie” in the same conversation.

    #145748
    Dan Child
    Participant

    A mushroom walks into a bar, “We don’t serve mushrroms here!”…. the mushroom replies, “But i’m a fungi!”

    A sausage walks into a bar, the bartender says “sorry, we don’t serve food here”

    #145749
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Very lame Ty. Definetly runs in the family

    #145750
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    He gets his great jokes from me and his good looks from his mother!

    A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job. In the first room she said she would like a pale blue. The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out “GREEN SIDE UP!” In the second room she told the painter she would like it painted in a soft yellow. He wrote this on his pad, walked to the window, opened it, and yelled “GREEN SIDE UP!” The lady was somewhat curious but she said nothing. In the third room she said she would like it painted a warm rose color. The painter wrote this down, walked to the window, opened it and yelled “GREEN SIDE UP!”

    The lady then asked him, “Why do you keep yelling ‘green side up’?”
    “I’m sorry,” came the reply. “But I have a crew of blondes laying sod across the street.

    #145751
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Two peanuts walk into a bar and ask the bartender to call the cops. “Why?” asks the bartender. The one peanut said,” My friend was a salted.

    #145752
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    This will make John proud also.

    A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says, “I’ll take a beer please and one for the road.”

    #145753
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    With these jokes I can Tell Feb. is a slow month!!!!!!!!!!

    #145754
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    😯 a midget walked into a bar.

    #145755
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    February is February. Sigh. Every year its the same thing. And every year spring comes. But it is a good month to reload, clean up, sharpen up, analyze last year, plan ahead and get ready to rock. My question, is, Are you ready?

    #145756
    Va06
    Participant

    Funny stuff, I’ ll post my mug soons as I figure out how and reply, hold your breath, I clean up well.

    #145757
    Va06
    Participant

    Who ever posted my picture, thanks. I was just getting ready to shower.

    #145758
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    or just leaving from a police interrogation

    #145759
    Dan Child
    Participant

    Funny stuff, I’ ll post my mug soons as I figure out how and reply, hold your breath, I clean up well.

    You said you wanted your “mug” up, so i put up the best one i could find 😉

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